You're a bit short for a Storm Trooper....

So it's been a while since I blogged and to be honest I've been trying to find something to blog about. I have started some off that may come later, but I needed something that would spark my imagination into it's usual chaotic self....

So what did it?

Well I was reminded of a strange happening from 11 years ago.. it was in 1999 (Prince was still partying at this time). I remember clearly when it was, because of where I had been that night, but the actual incident seems foggy and unreal.

But let me paint a picture before I go on... I've now been on this earth for the best part of nearly 40 years and done quite a few things, some seemily impossible and been to quite a few places as well in the meantime...

I've been in a taxi in Venusula, that took the path as a short cut.

Swam in the gulf of Mexico in superhero underpants.

Watched Alien at the age of 7 and not been affected by it.

I've been on the amazon river and met some indians and traded my Batman boat for a bow and arrow, seen a 2 and a half inch long ant, a rare amazonian dolphin and ate beetroot...

Had a pet chicken, rescued a hummingbird from a stoning.

Beat up an older kid.

Sung solo in-front of 300 people about my daddy wouldn't by me a bow-wow and that I had a little cat and was very fond of that but I'd rather have a bow-wow-wow, along with about another 4 things I had to do that evening.

Had a second near death experience involving a children's roundabout, a train track and a short period of blacking out, my fingers losing their grip being the last image I remember.

I've had a car crash head first into the door of our car right next to my head, then the door and passenger of that car precede to fall onto the road.

I've experienced large earthquakes, terrorist bombs, scorpions an inch from my face and not with a glass partition...

Taken an Incan human thigh bone as a club (I wasn't allowed to keep that)

.....and all of that was before I hit my tenth birthday.

So after 10 well...

I had 2 ghostly experiences...

I had my third near death experience, were I got throttled till I passed out by a second former... after my "friends" locked me in the corridor refusing to open the door.

I was nearly run over coming out of a phone box on a dark and foggy night, by a car that mounted the pavement... I could see my reflection in the side window it was that close.....

I've stepped onto a plane and travelled the best part of 2000 miles for a Job interview.

Stood by a raging sea at 4am drunk, crying and wondering whether I should just jump in and end it all...

I've had my heart irreparably broken by the most beautiful woman I've ever known so far and kissed.

I've been the "other man", to someone who many thought would have never chosen me in a month of Sundays.

Had a one night stand after a works doo, who told me I was a good kisser and could have not imagined that I was.... I didn't go looking for this compliment... but now had it 3 times...

Kissed a millionairess, who was named after one of Captain Scarlets Angels, which totally blew me away being the geek I am. S.I.G

I own nearly 7000 comics, hundreds of magazines, over 30 cameras.

So it's fair to say I've done a fair few things, some which are probably fairly unique.

But the uniqueness off this experience is probably why I remember it like a dream.

So it was a Thursday 15th of July 1999 and the opening night of Star Wars Episode 1. I had managed to get tickets for the premier show at my previous place of employment, (one of the only other people who reads this worked with me at the time and a fine person she is now as she was then).

So there was Me, My now bezzie mate Bret, my former best mate Andy, Nick and Phil a couple of guys I worked with and two others. All of us eager to see the film, after the long wait from the last in 1983 Return of the Jedi, with the annoying Ewoks.... when most of us were in short pants and didn't view princess Leia in her slave outfit as something sexy... well Nick never would... I know he would have Han Solo instead.

So the curtain parted to loud applause and so began the film... a mixture of all we knew and more.. thanks to computer animation.

But this thing didn't happen till way after the film had finished....

After dropping Phil off in his native Notlob... Me and Andy had a short hop over the dark moors back to the dire Burn, passed the crappy town of Darren.

Now Darren is a special sort of place... I did work there for a while and it's not nice, the biggest named shop was Poundland and there was a huge clustering of double width buggies and single teenage mums, greater than the nation average.. and on the way in, on the dark moors someone has mounted a large cross on the hill, just incase you forget.... what I've often wondered.

So this short hop we had to traverse the dreaded A666, which has had a high percentage of crashes (one I was involved in many moons ago) and a fairly high amount of deaths.

So as you can see from the picture below forest surrounds the road on both sides and at the time we arrived.. pitch black...

So as we got to this very point after midnight, I first saw a red flash up ahead in the darkness, both me and my mate thought it maybe someone in trouble and my headlights just reflected off their warning triangle.... but then as we drew a little closer, a green flash appeared and disappeared, with this we began to feel a little spooked... we had discussed previously about going on a ghost hunt in another location..

But could this be my third such ghostly experience and my very first on this road? I thought it was about time to see something, only because of the amount of times I drove down it on a regular basis.

So on I drove now with a touch more fear than this road usually gave me... and prepared myself for what vision may lie ahead.....

More flashes now fill the darkness in front of us... the closer we drew to the Lay-by, that we both knew to be ahead... but the sight that presented itself as we drew up... well take a look at the picture below... for it is what we saw in the darkness...

Yes this is what we actually saw.... Darth Vader having a light saber duel, with Qui-Gon Jinn, all the while a rather portly Princess Leia waited around the front of the Ford Fiesta... the fate of the galaxy must have been in huge peril if the mode of transport was a MK3 Fiesta..

So both me and my friend gawked at each other.... did we really just see that?.. we laughed all the way home... still unsure to this day....

Over the following years I did tell a few people about it and also told it on the radio as an opening to stories of the haunted A666... the Devils Road...

So was the devil playing tricks with our minds?... and did we really see what we thought we saw? Truth being some more over excited geeks than ourselves having a bit of fun.... and only 5 people in the world probably know the truth....

I still like to dream...

Frog log

There was a young Frog who sat on a log resting in a bog,

Which apparently made him sound like a dog,

Curious he pondered, once I sat on this log I no longer sound like a frog but instead I have the woof of the dog.

While his brain did cog over the mystery of the log, down came a thick fog.

He sat on his log for the full slog, till the fog did clear to show a hog.

A hog as big as a large dog, now looked at the frog who sat on the log and woofed like a dog.

Who are you remarked the Hog, Me? I'm just a mystery Frog.

And who are you Hog? How did you end up in this bog?

Well said the Hog, I went for a jog but got lost in the fog.

So there they did chat this jogging hog and mystery frog, both sat on the log, in a bog drinking egg nog from two clogs.

The End