A ghostly Cheerio of Xmas past Stave 1

It's the night before Christmas and all is still, nothing stirs not even a mouse, all apart from I Fester the Rabbit, Bearer of this Christmas tale ...

Hello reader and welcome to this Christmas ghostly tale.... I be Fester Rabbit, an unknown to you...for now...I'm the bearer of a tale of misfortune, dread and more dread, with a sprinkle of love..... but my tale is basically like Dickens Christmas Carol but using cereal... and using a glittery bouncing ball as one of the props.

I start my tale where it all seemingly began, but it wasn't the first love between two cereals... Here at the top of the stairs, round the back, in the none carpeted area... was where Chaz and Suzi loved, lived and lost. But unknown to them it wasn't the first time, it had happened once before but way back in the past, the area didn't always look like this.....

or this, we need to travel farther back.....gaze into my large glittery ball.....

Back to about here.... Christmas Eve 1843

Back to when it could have been a cold wintery Big Smoke street, here in the office of cereal accountants Marley Bran Flake (deceased) and Ebenezer Crunchy Nut and sat in the cold office..

is the lonely apprentice Bob Cheerio, hunched over his desk shivering.

"One hundred and one..." came the voice from the warm glowing office in the back.

Knock, knock,

"Excuse me sir, would it be fine for me to leave for the day, is gone past 11 it's almost Christmas day".

"Hobnobs & Humbugs" came the reply.

"I suppose so Bob, it will save me the price of a piece of coal, I'll see you tomorrow"

"But Sir it's Christmas Day, I was hoping to spend it with my family"

"mmmm Humbug! again it will save me the money so have it off, but you must work harder the following day".

"Thank you sir and Merry Christmas!"

"Humph! Humbug! now bugger off Cheerio!"

-

So off with glee did the Cheerio run, back to his matchstick box home and his rather large family.

"Finally Husband, where had you been" asked his good lady wife.

"Oh Mr Scrooge had a big account that needed balancing, a large group of painted Christmas plates depicting our lord Jesus and his band as cats had gone missing whilst being delivered to a few OAP's in Cricklewood... and a second batch had to be sent out via pigeon at the last minute, so the client was checking if they could be tax deductable, I couldn't say no, it was worth an extra farthing"

His good lady wife pecked him on his cheek and rolled her eyes.

"That Crunchy Nut, takes advantage of you Bob".

"Father, Father" came the noise from the other match box compartment and from it ran their 12.5 children...

"Hello, Chantelle, Charlotte, Charlie, Chuck, Charmaine, Chatwin, Chester, Chelsea, Cher, Cheryl, Chambell, Chloe and Tim, what are you still doing up at this time?".

"We're all waiting for Santa...., we've left out a pistashio nut shell for Rudolph and a mint for Santa, his breath must smell after all them pies and sherry, last year he did smell a little of wee...".

"Well you'd better be back off to bed, or else he'll not get here on time"

So off they went back to the threadbare bed....

"Good lady wife have you managed to go to the pennyworld shop and buy some presents?"

"I did good husband, but we must wrap up all tonight, I got our 3 pennys to spread as far as possible, I got:

Chantelle, the comedy Roleen Cooney stickon eyebrows and mustache.

Charlotte the Spices Fake bunion set.

Charlie, the Rayne Wooney top pump set,

Chuck, the Bavid Eh n' Ermm! fantasmagorical machine.

Charmaine, the Theyl Weedy's My first AAA book.

Chatwin, Manny Myers hard mans soap on a rope.

Chester, the Soe Jwash blow your own Kazoo

Chelsea, the Over Price doll.

Cher, Kerry Cat-tonies One Trick Pony Kit.

Cheryl, Bordon Growns' Mumble Grumble Tin Can.

Chambell, The Half a Pence saggin' set.

Chloe, Wayne Kest's comedy false teeth.

and Tim didn't want any tat, just a new pair of gloves.

And I just had enough to get us fuel for all winter, they had copies of Bussell Rands Booky Wooky, as many as you want for free and it worked out cheaper than buying firewood, I've got 800 in the yard... and another delivery of 1500 coming Tuesday..
but I'm afraid after all that I bought our Christmas dinner may not be nutritional enough for our needs, but I did manage to get one Percy Piglets for all the family Xmas Dinner.

..... but we have nothing left. The piglet will have to last a while.... we have such a large family because TV hasn't been invented yet or Johnnies and we are catholic, I worry so for Half Tim after his accident with that drop of milk you know how fragile he is.."

"It will be fine good wife now lets get on with the wrapping"


But things weren't so pleasant in the crunchy nut house hold..... (Onward to Stave 2)