Tuesday 19 October 2010

the sobering walk....


For some reason I've always felt the need to walk after a night out on the tiles or painting the town red....

From my early days of enjoying the bright lights, to the more recent ventures into the world... I still have this inherent need to walk.. and be in my own bed, with familiar surroundings... maybe it's a Caveman instinct, to be safe in your own cave... it also where I first perfected my disappearing act... and started my Homing pigeon instinct....

It first began back when I was just 17.. nearly 18... I'd just my first works Christmas doo, many of my pals knew I'd never really taken a liking to the booze, so they had planned my evenings drinking menu...

I turned up with £20 in my pocket, which back in 1991 was enough... 1 pint of Guiness, 2 lagers and a vodka with orange plus a chance find of £5 on the floor.. my night was done.. and I now had £25.... so after quick goodbye's.. off I toddled... home a short while later.... 2.3 miles.. slightly damp and a grin on my face greeted by my parents.... this was the first time of many...

So this was the start of something...

There was a few ways to get home, various distances, including the scenic one along the side of the Leeds to Liverpool Canal, but this only could be done in the day time... it was stumbled in the summer of 96 after the end of college and a few New-key Browns, it was slightly longer than all other options but like I said it was scenic.....

Eventually I extended my walk from the centre of town after the clubs... Peppermint Place, Mr G's and Manhattan Heights, Northern Lights... still most were uneventful as I always had rules of which to follow:

1. Always walk or stagger as fast as possible...

2. Always have the other person, stranger walking home on the opposite side of the road..

3. Don't look drunk.....

but there was a few incidents that I'm going to mention....

First memorable time was just after a riot in the town. We'd been to far to many clubs, saying goodbye to our swedish colleague as he was going home.... once the clubs had shut it was off to the all night snooker club... My cue control was non existent ... but a couple of hours later off I went home....

Now the riots had been going from town to town in the Northwest, some quite serious... so it was a little risky to be on my own and white.... but it was 5am and was getting light, (even rioters had to sleep)..... and looking around I seemed to be the only hint of life (be it staggering like a zombie) in a empty town for quite a while... no cars, trucks...

Until one police car came down the road.. and pulled up at the side of me....

Policeman: Hello.. where have you been?
Me: Drinking, Pub.. (no doubt with breath that could have peeled paint, I could only say single words and hoped they'd form a sentence).
Policeman: Till this time!...
Me: no sorry, been playing snooker...
Policeman: ...right....What's your name?...(his colleague smirking in the background of my foggy vision)
(here I had to chance to be named anything I wished.. but opted for the truth, just in case)
Policeman: No we're not looking for you.. bye...


They were very polite.. but they could have given me a lift.. I was freezing...

All this being a fairly boring first incident....

Things soon progressed and my distance increased once again... but the saviour on this occasion, what late night food, be it a kebab or in this case a large garlic bread (yes it is the future we've seen it).

This time I had accompanied a friend back to their house, but then I had to get home... all be it happy with my garlic bread...

So I exited the estate.. but in doing so passed a few people.. and one getting questioned by two young boys... about if he had seen their dog...

Now 2 things automatically went through my brain... first why were these kids where up at this time... but secondary and most importantly.. I knew I was going to meet this dog and from the description, it was fairly big....

So I quickened my pace, which was a mistake.. rather than get me away quicker... it just meant I met the dog sooner.... so the next thing I know is there is a growling behind me... and it's nothing to do with bodily functions.....

What does one do in this situation?... it's dark, the dog has already taken an offence to meeting me... so much to my dismay I dropped some of my garlic bread....

Now the area I was in I'd have been surprised if this dog had seen such a bountiful meal presented to him...and so proceeded to eat away... but apart from the helpful quickening of my pace... this lead to me gaining a new friend...

So again a growling came from behind.... so being a bit of a mouse rather than a man (remember it was a large dog) I took one last bite and closed the rest in the box... and dropped it.. before the wet nose could get any closer to my behind.

The last noise I heard was the dog trying to get in the box and I ran off...

The third incident well the walk was not as long... but what happened was a very close call...

In the picture below near the trees on the left used to be a phone box..


I'd got this far, again in the company of a friend, but on this evening it was a cold and foggy and not too late, so thankfully I could still ring my mother, who had already said she'd pick me up.

Now this was a badly lit area.. and the phone box had no door (which thinking of what happened could have lead to something worst...)

So 10p in the slot.. it was just before I had a mobile.. and a quick conversation.. I was done...

Now since my early outings to the bright lights I've developed tinitus and on this night I had been yet again in a rather loud pub...

As I turned round to exit the box... there was a squel of tyres... then a rush of movement... but along with this was a reflection of my face....

'A reflection of his face?'...

What had happened was a car had come to the junction down the hill at some pace... flying through the lights and mounted the pavement, so as I turned round in the box the car missed me by a few inches... allowing me to see my shocked expression in it's windows.

But rather than stop it drove off, still at some pace in the direction of town... I stood there for longer than a moment .. shocked at my possible demise and also my lucky escape... and as I mentioned before, would it have been different if the box had a door?

I did not see the car as it had disappeared into the fog, one thing was for sure it wasn't my mother trying to get rid of me..

she turned up a few minutes later...

No comments:

Post a Comment